As I am getting mentally ready for a weekend full of dancing – can’t say I’m physically ready – I’m inclined to share something that has been in my mind for a while now. It’s a bit long for nowadays’ 30 seconds post standard but it just might be worthwhile. It was definitely worthwhile for me to get it off my mind! Let me know what you think.

I’ve recently started to experience a trend with some of my favorite followers. They do the same mickey mouse moves on certain parts of some songs, over and over. Sometimes they do the exact same little spiel every time we dance to the same song.

I believe this is born out dancing repeatedly to the same songs with leaders that end up doing the same thing they see people do in their scene. Unfortunately, they all end up with the same rhythmic interpretation, if not the exact same steps, syncopated in the same exact way. It gets boring.

This poses two problems for a leader 1) he has a hard time getting away with something different, quiçá, more surprising and tasteful 2) he feels he has to do what they’re expecting him to do thus avoiding the ignorant/not being a cool kid vibe.

The first point is more close to my heart as I believe it can really start to stifle creativity. Early on the dancing career it’s ok one thinks – “she can do her spiel as she really enjoys it” – but after a while it becomes annoying. My mind goes something like this: “I’ve done what you’re expecting me to do lots and lots of times before so can we try something different this time? Trust me, we can even enjoy ourselves just listening to it while pausing. You know what, we are going to be the cool kids because we’ll be different than anyone else!”. You’d be surprised as to how hard it can be just to pause sometimes. It is even harder to explore together new rhythmic interpretations.

As to avoiding the feeling of not being a cool kid it only comes with time and a friendlier community. Normally friendly goes alongside with knowledge, let us remind ourselves. The leader will have normally two reactions from the ladies. The condescending “oh, that’s cute” or the “oh, he’s trying something different, let’s check it out, I may actually like it and broaden my interpretation possibilities (followers do interpret the songs too)”. I know the one I like more.

To this date only one teacher has emphasized the idea of exploring the limits of music interpretation. He had us to try not dancing to the beat at all. It’s not straightforward specially if you’re musically inclined, or so I realized. It was obviously an exercise but one that has a lot of benefits and practical applications. Subtle interpretations of the dance can come out of it so try it out. It’s an extreme but you can slowly then start going towards the beat.

Dear Debbi, your post regarding tango etiquette on how you gracefully explained to a young leader the 101 of a milonga etiquette is great. I do, however, digress with you on the reason why people leave Tango for some other dance. There’s just not enough kind persons willing to explain this stuff in the tango scenes of some cities. Yes, the teachers should do this. But so should anyone.

It’s the off putting attitude of people that generally turns people down on activities. Everyone wants to be welcomed to a social group and enlightened with a positive spin.

If you’re a starting leader, don’t fret about your mistakes and mishaps. The kindest followers tend to also be the truly kind persons. The ones concerned about setting everyone right – specially the young and naive – tend to have a big ego and dance more with their own ego during the dance than with you.

I lead most of the time I dance tango. I practice my follower’s skills in practicas. In milongas, I will sometimes follow in playful roles swaps with some lady friends.

I love to follow. It has been a process of re-discovering the dance. It made me gain much more appreciation for the dance and in particular, for how a leader can make a dance wonderful.

After reading this entry from tangopilgrim I realized why I love to follow. While leading I always need to be ahead of the follower and the dance in some ways, as a follower I release myself from all that and focus on the present. And the present only.

Recently I had a chance to dance with a relatively famous Tango DJ. I immediately realized she was a really nice person since even though she was tired she still swapped her sandals for some dancing shoes after I asked her. That, on everyone’s book, is a very nice gesture.

We danced and chatted. The dancing was very cool, relaxing, flowy. I went for a laid-back interpretation of the music. Enrique Rodriguez. I shared with her about how I’ve been going back and forth between different approaches to interpreting music. Basically to either try to capture the mood of the whole music or to try and dance every tiny nuance/detail of the song. She joked about it and told me I was maybe worrying to much about it…

That further led us to talk about how we spend our time at the milongas. She then told me something very interesting that reminded me of how I sometimes forget how social the milongas should be. The thing she enjoys more at the milongas, believe it or not, is not actually the non-stop dancing. What she enjoys more is to sit and eat while talking with people mixed with the dancing.

Here’s to food and wine at milongas!

Why can’t I pivot like the pros!

I said hi and she said hi back to me. The last and only time we danced was, according to my recollection, disappointing. To her.

I was nervous since I had seen her dance before. She was obviously a gifted dancer. I could not connect and figure out her style. Nothing in that dance “connected” to me. Not with the music, not with her. My mind had been haunted already with the images of her confidence dancing with great dancers. I could not shake that off. The dance was not our dance, it was someone else’s, badly impersonated. A sad affair.

She remembered me. She remembered me as a person.

In the milonga world there are dancers and amazing human beings that love to dance. I admire the latter. I am grateful she reminded me of that.

Thank you.

I’m still alive, thinking and living tango. But writing less. Dancing a bit less too, but alas, life gets in the way. I have been out socially a bit less than what I used to and having less flavorful nights when I do. Some politics to deal with and a busy life have kept me from fully enjoying some nights.

I don’t really have much to say so I will share with you two videos from Fabian Peralta and Virginia Pandolfi. These are recent videos shot at Salon Canning, earlier in the year.

I find their interpretation very close to the music. This is the current trend except for older milongueros it seems. And maybe Melina and Detlef.

Anyway, here’s hope that one day I can be as close to the music so that I can then detach from it.

My tango vals question still has to deserve an answer from anyone. Feel free to say it’s a stupid question. But be nice about it.

You don’t need to turn down people that have been nice to you before just to be accepted to a clique.

I know a festival is a moment where you think you need to be accepted by others but perhaps being nice to the leaders that have helped you blossom will go a longer way than you believe.

I get reminded by a follower that all the technique in the world are useless if you’re not committed to the dance or to dancing with someone…